I don't trust God.
Well, in theory, I trust God. I want to trust God, but I am so afraid. No one in my life has been always there, no one in my life has been worthy of trust and so I am convinced that God is just like every other person.
So, I don't trust God. Even though I want to trust God and even though I am so afraid, I am going to take a chance and just trust him. I'm pretty sure that's faith.
I'm reminded that in Mark 9, Jesus interacted with a father who had a demon possessed son:
Mark 9:23-25New King James Version (NKJV)
23 Jesus said to him, “If you can believe,[a] all things are possible to him who believes.”
24 Immediately the father of the child cried out and said with tears, “Lord, I believe; help my unbelief!”
25 When Jesus saw that the people came running together, He rebuked the unclean spirit, saying to it: “Deaf and dumb spirit, I command you, come out of him and enter him no more!”
Lord, I believe; help my unbelief. I am SO there. Ok, maybe I don't have a demon possessed son, but I have aches for things in my life that require my faith in God.
There are a few circumstances where I am so very aware of my inability to do anything to influence the situation. So I'm going to have to trust God has a plan to deal with those things. I am going to have to trust that his way is the best way for me, I am going to have to trust him. I am going have to trust.
Sigh. Trust.
No comments:
Post a Comment