views and thoughts from a mundane and regular life

Finding Beautiful Things in My Everyday World

views and thoughts from a mundane and regular life


Wednesday, June 12, 2013

Having a really bad day...

It's now over 14 months since David's death.

Things are ok.  I mean, today has been rough.  I don't know why I am so anxious to love again, to be loved again.  I know that things will happen in time.

So, I'm having a bad day.  Like a really bad day.  Not so bad that I'm worried about myself but bad enough.  And there is no away to run to... David was my away.  He left me with a great life, and no one with whom to share it.  I know this feeling is temporary.  I know it gets better.... but it is not better today.

I feel like I am wrong somehow.  I feel like I am broken or messed up and while I am told that this is not really the case, that my life was broken FOR me, it's still broken.

I don't have anything hopeful to say today.  This feels bad, and I don't like it.

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